| from yesterday |
[16 Dec 2009|02:54pm] |
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mood |
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 nostalgic |
] |
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music |
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i'll be there for you - the rembrandts |
] |
And,
I'll be there for you (When the rain starts to pour)
I'll be there for you (Like I've been there before)
I'll be there for you ('Cause you're there for me too)
As i look through the pile of our old photographs, i asked myself "why do all good things come to an end?". Our once shared dream, whatever happened to it. Jamaica by our 21st birthday, it's coming to our 22nd and there are only three of us left standing. I was watching Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants 2 and there's no one else i could think of but you ladies. I do miss our old times together but i'm glad we made it this far even though we are not as close as we used to be, you ladies will always be in my heart. =)
In loving memory of our "friendship":
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| the death of love |
[28 Oct 2009|11:01am] |
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mood |
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 frustrated |
] |
| [ |
music |
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turn back time - aqua |
] |
If only I could turn back time
If only I had said what I still hide
If only I could turn back time
I would stay for the night
If only I could ...
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| a spoonful of sugar |
[11 Sep 2009|03:09pm] |
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mood |
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 loved |
] |
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music |
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give you my all - eyes set to kill |
] |
I want to give you everything I'll give you my all
Because you gave me
You gave me your lips a gentle kiss
The medicine to cure my pain
After all we've been through, i'm still glad that i've chosen this path. It taught me so much and no one else could have ever tolerated with my nonsense and whatnots like you do. For once i feel imporant and useful in someone's life. To us, four months and beyond. Even if it'll come to an end, i just don't think i'll ever get over you.
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| sweetness follows |
[27 May 2009|12:56am] |
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mood |
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 pleased |
] |
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music |
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fall for you - secondhand serenade |
] |
So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in, I'm yours to keep
And hold on to your words 'cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight when you're asleep
Embrace changes and you'll find yourself welcoming such a pleasant surprise. I realised now it all happened for a reason. Look at us today, if we had not undergone those traumatic experiences, this newfound happiness could not have possibly reached us. It was all too dreamy to begin with. Beneath that milky twilight with hints of "somewhere only we know" floating in the air, it was the perfect night to get ourselves caught in love. Just a day after tomorrow, we found ourselves on the moonlit floor enjoying a tale of Shakespeare with the warmth of your embrace and the night. "I'm floating like the warmest sun, for you and I have just begun"
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| a man's got a limit |
[11 Apr 2009|01:12am] |
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mood |
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pleased |
] |
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music |
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the importance of being idle - oasis |
] |
I lost my faith in the summer time ‘Cause it don’t stop raining The sky all day is as black as night But I’m not complaining  My instinct is reliable and it's been nagging at me to start cleaning my room before my mum chases me with the vacuum cleaner and the amount of pests that is probably nestling peacefully among my shitload of junks needs to be exterminated.
Since i'm gonna get my second last payment soon. I'm gonna surprise my family with a nice gift, dinner or whatever. I can't believe in two days time it'll be my last day with the company and also my 21st birthday. Life is a bliss. I'm so lovin' it. =D |
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| WOOHOO! |
[06 Apr 2009|12:05pm] |
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mood |
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ecstatic |
] |
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music |
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song 2 - blur |
] |
When I feel heavy metal WOOHOO!
And I'm pins and I'm needles WOOHOO!
Well I lie and I'm easy
All of the time but I'm never sure why I need you
Pleased to meet you!
Oasis was fucking worth it too. I just LOVE free standing gigs. It's fun to push and jab ppl's ribs esp those cunts who keep airing their smelly armpits right smacked on your face. But thankfully i was standing next to this guy with a fantab odour of Body Shop's White Musk. Heaven~ I'm gonna start wearing that perfume!
I'm left with 4 more days excluding the PH and weekends and I'm getting more and more lazy. Thanks to Leo i'm now addicted to Sorority Life which totally did not help with my schwork and work work. Oh whatever. Just cross the bridge when I come to it. I'm so psyched for my coming endless holidays. Now i can happily play street tai tee till the wee hours with those donkeys and what else oh yeah sorority life and morning jogs, nature walks, more weekdays with ernz and movie marathons! But before that this Thursday calls for a Madhatters' Party - oh yeah! Life is beautiful.. so beautiful.. it's beautiful to me!
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| to the shore of freedom |
[20 Mar 2009|04:19pm] |
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mood |
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excited |
] |
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music |
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piazza, new york catcher - belle & sebastian |
] |
Piazza, New York catcher, are you straight or are you gay?
We hung about the stadium, we've got no place to stay,
We hung about the Tenderloin and tenderly you tell,
About the saddest book you ever read, it always makes you cry.
I can't believe it! It's less than a month now though the time still flies as slowly as ever. Come April, like what I told leo, I'll say to everyone around me "Whoa time flies, didn't it?!". I can't wait for that day oh yeahhh. And if that's not enough of a celebration, one week before my last day, i'll come at 9am sharp everyday. Hahaha just for the kick, fun and laughter~ Weeee~ Goodbye past, Hello life! =O
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| how it feels |
[19 Feb 2009|10:33pm] |
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mood |
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 lonely |
] |
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music |
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the woodlands national anthem - arcade fire |
] |
Trees keep falling at my feet
I guess it's time to build a boat
Make a raft of our bodies
Do you think that it'll float?
I took one moment to turn on my left side and relived those moments we once shared together. That morning laughter that lasted till lunchtime is just an echo from the past. When the urge strikes to do a little chitchat with my fellow neighbour, she’s no longer there. Sadly, I’m the only soul left in Siberia. But at the same time, I don’t wanna move anywhere else. After all, my little corner has the best view. I get to see the bright morning sun fades to dusk. Could I ask for more? Sometimes in life, you just gotta turn the negatives into positives. Looking on the bright side of life, I have Coldplay tix in my hand! Well literally at least. Till I meet Ernz and she’ll pass me the tix. Other than that, I’m feeling guilty lately for not keeping in touch with the others. I’m really sorry ladies. I wanna do the same as what you girls did, I wanna repay that deed! Coming all the way to deserted Pasir Ris land just to catch Twilight with me, I really appreciated that. I just need time. Come April onwards, I promise! My attention will steer back to you ladies. Don’t think I don’t treasure our friendship, you girls meant a whole lot to me. I swear~
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| oh simple thing, where have you gone? |
[08 Feb 2009|12:22am] |
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mood |
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discontent |
] |
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music |
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somewhere only we know - keane |
] |
And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go, somewhere only we know?
It's so true that all good things come to an end. Sometimes you just wish you can live in naivety and ignorance and feels like you're walking on sunshine. I think I pushed myself too far this time round. Peers around me don't make it easy either. Maybe I'm just paranoid but my instinct tells me sooner or later, a surprise gonna popped out of it. Till that time comes, I hope I'm ready to handle it smoothly. We live in a sad world, Chris was wrong.
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| just like a prayer. |
[04 Feb 2009|01:35am] |
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mood |
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loved |
] |
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music |
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mmmnn - grandadbob |
] |
More to learn
More to need
I believe
In a real world
I have an appetite of a pig when best friend comes to visit each month. I can eat an entire tray of food and I would still find for more food say 15 minutes later. While my friends are adopting diets and regular jogging, I am here stuffing myself away. Hahaha what a way to go. I'm not complaining though when my craving for latte kicked in again today. Was figuring out how the hell am I gonna get my hands on a latte when my dearest IDA text to say she's heading to Starbucks to study! Just like a prayer! She bought my much needed latte and I can't stop saying my thanks and love-youssss. So many kind souls surrounding me. I must love them all with every breath that I take. Ok perhaps that's too much. On a heavier note, I'm sleep deprived and I have shitloads of school and work stuffs to do. It's alright muffin, you have 2 months, 1 week and 2 more days to go. I know I can do this! =))
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| light a candle |
[28 Jan 2009|02:43pm] |
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mood |
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sore |
] |
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music |
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what can i do - the corrs |
] |
Maybe there's nothing more to say
And in a funny way I'm calm
Because the power is not mine
I'm just gonna let it fly
Having undergone a long battle, with so many obstacles, it is such a relief that there's only ten more weeks to go. Morning chantings to get myself out of bed and repeatedly reminding myself that i can do this, i've made it through yet again. I sure hope this will be the greatest reward in my life fore i have lose some and win some along the way. I've been through a lot of struggles with my emotions - from sad, to being hurt, to feeling the pain, a pinch of jealousy, all numb and now i'm just a cold person. I've accepted things as they are and if things can't be the way it used to be, i'll compromise and adapt to it. But i just want to say that i still do cherish the past and the happy times together even if it doesn't mean a shit now. I'm a girl who believes in yesterdays...
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| so much at stake |
[17 Jan 2009|01:33am] |
| [ |
mood |
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sad |
] |
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music |
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speed of sound - coldplay |
] |
The sign that I couldn't read,
Or a light that I couldn't see,
Some things you have to believe,
But others are puzzles, puzzling me.
Challenges feel great when you overcome it. But if you fail, the stupid ache will remain there. Take it with your chin up high, a newly developed philosophy that's hard to live by especially when you are cursed with a weak heart like mine. I'm partially handicap now that one listening ear is gone.
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| blissful |
[01 Jan 2009|07:40pm] |
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mood |
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chipper |
] |
| [ |
music |
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clocks - coldplay |
] |
Come out upon my seas
Cursed missed opportunities
Am I a part of the cure?
Or am I part of the disease?
new year celebration was awesome. through those ups and downs, it still does not despair my drive and motivation to make 2009 the best year ever. i thank god for all the friends i've found and those obstacles i've tackled. cheers to the new year~
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| fresh start. |
[31 Dec 2008|01:32am] |
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mood |
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excited |
] |
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music |
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animal instinct - the cranberries |
] |
And the thing that gets to me
Is you'll never really see
And the thing that freaks me out
Is I'll always be in doubt
For the first time ever, I felt so relaxed. I may not have complete all the three tasks i set out to do before the New Year but at least i covered one of it. Excellent start to a New Year and i'm so ready for 2009! Bring it on! I want more surprises and challenges, most importantly i want my license and a splendid 21st birthday! Totally can't wait!
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| these are my confessions |
[28 Dec 2008|04:13pm] |
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mood |
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 indescribable |
] |
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music |
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this year's love - david gray |
] |
So whose to worry
If our hearts get torn
When that hurt gets thrown
Don't you know this life goes on
Christmas is over. Curfews are met. The battle between parents and child is never ending. New Year brings about the need to set new resolutions. I've a lot to do before the deadline is up which on New Year's eve itself. I need all the strength, I can do this.
Things to do before 2009:- Tell the truth to Dad before Mum opens her nasty mouth
- Heart-to-heart talk with mum (through a letter probably if it's too hard)
- Set things clear between us (every single details from scratch)
New Year Resolutions:- I've tried it all. Satisfy my curiosity. Now is the time to be a good girl, once again.
- Having friends come with a price. It's hard to make everyone happy. Divide my time equally for all of them. On top of that, find a time for family as well.
- I've win some and lose some. Set my priorities right. It's time to achieve whatever goals I've not attain.
- I'm strong-willed. Stubborn needless to say. It's time for me to think about others now. Put people's feelings first and most importantly learn to understand Mum.
- Everyone craves for love. It's soon to be my 21st. I must learn not to be infatuated easily. Know what I want or what I'm striving for, do not settle for the less.
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| craves for sleep. |
[18 Dec 2008|02:59pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 sleepy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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new slang - the shins |
] |
I'm looking in on the good life
I might be doomed never to find
Without a trust or flaming fields
Am i too dumb to refine?
i've been stoning. brain ain't working, it has dried up. mc donald's breakfast still lies still in my stomach. three cans/cups of coffee i've downed. loads of articles to finish by this week. completely no sense of urgency. but last night was totally spontaneous, who would have thought i won't be sleeping for the night. dinner to just chilling out to sleepover. wake me up, i think i'm asleep.
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| queer coincidence |
[16 Dec 2008|09:54am] |
| [ |
mood |
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calm |
] |
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music |
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expectations - belle & sebastian |
] |
You've been used, you're confused
Write a song, I'll sing along
Are you calm? Settle down
Soon you will know that you are sane
an afternoon taxi ride and i've turned wiser. great to have a cabby driver who happens to be a former counsellor. sometimes you wonder how we crossed each other's path, strangers especially. there was once i kept bumping into this stranger wherever i go. strange but we've never get the chance to know each other. and there are also cases where you meet certain people in your life where they left such a mark that you can never ever forget them. strange yet interesting.
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| so confused |
[14 Dec 2008|11:11pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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melancholy |
] |
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music |
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dreams - the cranberries |
] |
But now I'm feeling it even more
Because it came from you
And then I open up and see
The person falling here is me I've become so numb. I've never pictured myself to be this way. I've never pictured any part of my life to be this way. The state that I am in, no one can understand. Sometimes I feel content but I'm not satisfied with just being content. History is repeating itself. Deja-vu? I really think so. On a lighter note, someone is finally on the same path as me. I feel less lonely now.
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| hatred |
[11 Dec 2008|08:53pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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touched |
] |
| [ |
music |
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running up that hill - placebo |
] |
Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder,
There is thunder in our hearts, baby,
So much hate for the ones we love,
Tell me, we both matter, don't we?
unrealistic. unsymphathetic. what parents are made of these days. when all the pressure is on you and the next person you turn to are friends. even friends cannot be trusted thus leaving you all alone. just when the day gets gloomy, you came and brighten it up. this infatuation is growing stronger it's becoming unhealthy. save me before i fall too deep, as confusing as it sounds.
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| rain on me. |
[11 Dec 2008|01:39am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 gloomy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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don't confess - tegan & sara |
] |
Don't think I'll escape
Why would I escape you
And don't think I'll replace
How could I replace you
Tired? I can't even tell it apart lately. Yesterday was tiring enough, physically and mentally. Today wasn't any better. And all I want to do right now is to find that shoulder to lean and even cry on. I'm not as strong as what I had deem myself to be. When you sacrificed so much and the least you expect out of it is honesty or the least respect, it's not there. Hurt? It's way more than that. I feel cheated and used. I don't even know what I'm looking forward to in life anymore.
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